The peace that passes understanding

Sarah Beth's pretty excited about the fishing pole Aunt Kay and Uncle John got her for Christmas. Who could have predicted my girl would love fishing so much?

I especially love that John is fully involved with this laugh. My kids are nothing if not entertaining.

My Hannah. She's more beautiful on the inside than the outside...love this girl's sweet, sweet heart.

I think this was the second fish John caught. And yes, I did let him fish in his pajamas.

I will give thanks to You, O LORD my God, with all my heart, and will glorify Your name forever. For Your lovingkindness toward me is great, and You have delivered my soul from the depths of Sheoul. Psalm 86:12-13

Well, good morning and Merry Christmas! I figured before my Christmas break got too far along I'd better go ahead and write a blog, since I haven't been exactly faithful to writing as often as I'd hoped. You guys who live in America full-time--how on earth do you keep up with the pace? It's eating us alive!! But we are slowing down a bit for break, and enjoying some family time and rest. Or at least we're planning to do that. It's what I have down on my calendar, so it has to happen, right? :)

It's been a weird couple of days. On Saturday, I had a lovely cup of coffee with one of my favorite people and then went shopping. In the middle of my first store, I found out that my Dad had developed a hard spot on the back of his leg that was red, and his cardiologist wanted him to go on to the emergency room in Orange Park, thinking that it was possibly a blood clot. So off to the hospital I went. Things were complicated by the fact that Marc had to leave for Tallahassee to speak in a church there on Sunday. Thankfully, Sarah Beth was home and took over the kids. It turned out that it wasn't a blood clot, but it was a staff infection that had caused Daddy to develop cellulitis. It turns out that cellulitis is extremely painful, and it was hard watching Daddy be in pain. (The best story--when he stood up to get in the wheelchair to head to his room from the emergency room, the pain was so bad that he yelled, "Oh, my GOSH!" He sat down really quickly, and then said to the guy with the wheelchair, "I'm so sorry." Ha! I'm pretty sure 'gosh' was the mildest thing he'd heard all day!) But after 24 hours of really high powered antibiotics, he was so much better. They may even let him go home with just oral antibiotics today. I'm so thankful. So, so thankful. Did I mention that I'm thankful?

Most of December (and part of November) has been taken up with what we've come to call The Lottie Moon Tour. We have been in different churches every weekend, sometimes two or three. And while that has been exhausting, it has also been really refreshing. Many of the churches we've been in have been small congregations of around 100 people. Oh, my goodness...the sweetness of these people, the overwhelming kindness they have shown us, their sacrificial giving so that people like us can live on the mission field...unbelievable. One of my favorite moments happened in a small church not too far from where we live. Marc had spoken about the Chuvash, and the pastor said, "Let's be one of those churches who prays for the Chuvash. If you want to pray for these people, come down to the altar, and let's have a time of prayer for them." Of course, pastors give that kind of invitation to pray at the altar all the time, so I wasn't particularly taken aback by that. What brought me to tears was when I looked up and the entire congregation was heading down the aisle, including a woman in a wheelchair and another with a cane. There they all knelt, the whole church, praying together for a people group they'd never heard of, halfway around the world, but who they loved because we love them and because God loves them. Oh, my goodness! The sweet, sweet spirit in that room was precious to me. Even writing this, I am overwhelmed by the ways in which these small congregations have ministered to us, who came to minister to them. I am thankful to serve a God who not only knows exactly what our spirits need, but who also provides exactly what we need in such interesting and unexpected ways. The Lottie Moon tour has been an excellent, soul-nurturing opportunity to connect with more Southern Baptist churches than I could have ever predicted. And I am so thankful for that.

The strangest stop on the Lottie tour for me was last week, when I spoke at my own church. I never get nervous when I have to speak, but I was VERY nervous last week. I'm not really sure why--our church has certainly showered us with love since we came back, providing a home and utilities and cars and food...so much more than I could ever list here. But there's something about speaking to people who know you...it was different for me. It went well, I think, and our church raised its Lottie Moon goal (plus a bunch) in one day, so I'm very grateful for that. But it was definitely different for me to speak to so many people I know.

Yesterday, our pastor preached a sermon about taking a different route (based on Matthew 2:12, where the magi go back a different way in order to avoid Herod), and one of the things he said really struck me. He was talking about ways you know God is directing you in a different path, and he talked about the peace of Christ confirming for us what we believe God is telling us. And I thought about all the ways in which God has confirmed our path for us. There is no part of me that longs to remain in the States. I am grateful for my time here. I loved singing in the Christmas program (especially the rendition of Little Drummer Boy with the Clay High drum line..what fun!), and I am loving all the American Christmas stuff--shopping and making goodies for folks--and I am, of course, eating up the time with my parents. And that is not to say that there aren't hard things about leaving, too. We will leave Sarah Beth on one continent and live on another continent, and that will be so difficult for me to do, because I am clearly nuts about my girl. And I will miss my family and friends here while I am over there. But our life is there. And as hard as it is, as much as I don't want to go back into language training, as much as I am not looking forward to dark months of ice and snow...it's my life. And I love it. There is a great joy and contentment in not only doing that to which Christ has called you, but in being the person Christ has called you to be. It is a joy and contentment and peace that is worth whatever sacrifice I am called to make. And that peace, that inexplicable, overwhelming peace that passes all understanding...that peace is a confirmation that we are doing what we are called to do, what we are meant to do, what we are created to do.

It's time for me to get moving. No one here is even awake, yet, but SB and I are doing some shopping today, so I probably should get her up and going. I am attempting to get everything done today and tomorrow, because I will be having some lovely oral surgery on Wednesday, and I am planning on getting some rest after that. While I am not looking forward to the dental work, I am in a good amount of pain, and I am looking forward to that being over. :) Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you are basking in the glow of Christmas with your family, and that you have come up with a pretty good Christmas surprise for your husband, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

Giving thanks with a grateful heart

John with my great-nephew, JJ. Two pretty sweet boys right here!

My kids are funny. I like that John is fully involved in a cackle here.

The fam. Oh, my word...I am one blessed woman!

Come and hear, all who fear God, and I will tell of what He has done for my soul. Psalm 66:16

NOTE: I wrote this while away from any internet connection last week.

I know it has been forever since I updated this. The pace of life in America has taken me a bit by surprise, and I have yet to feel that my life is somewhat organized. But I promised myself I would write at least one blog while on vacation and post it when I return, so here I am, early Wednesday morning, sitting on the dock with my Bible, this notebook and pen, and a rather strong cup of coffee. We are in east Texas at my sister and brother-in-law's lake house. We came in from Florida (via a speaking engagement in Alabama on Sunday) on Monday afternoon, and the rest of the family came in last night. Sarah Beth arrived late last night with her cousin, Katie, who drove her down from Tulsa. Now we are all here, ready to enjoy some time together. There will be games, bonfires and roasted marshmallows, and lots and lots of fishing.

We have spent a good part of the last few weeks traveling. We took Hannah home to Oklahoma for Marc's 20th college reunion. I have to be honest--that kind of thing never really enticed me much, which is surprising, because I loved college. But I'm so glad we went back. What a great time we had--seeing old friends, showing Hannah the campus, seeing some of our kids from Moscow. It confirmed for me something I'd really thought about as my kids got older--the importance of a Christian education. So much of who I am and what I believe was formed and shaped by my OBU experience. Don't get me wrong--I'm very proud of my degree from UF. However, I could not have done the giant, 4-year state university at 18. OBU was perfect for me. JBU is the perfect place for Sarah Beth. Wherever the other two wind up, I pray it will be at a Christian university, where Godly men and women can influence them in the same way those at OBU influenced me.

We left Saturday for Dothan, Alabama, where we spent the night before speaking at FBC Headland, Alabama, on Sunday morning. The real treat for us in Dothan was seeing our friends, Barb and Troy, and their kids. They came in from their home in Graceville, Florida, and spent the afternoon and early evening with us. What a blessing it is to spend time with precious friends we haven't seen since July, 2007. A lot has happened in the lives of both families, but the fellowship hasn't changed a bit. It amazes me how God brings people together to encourage and renew each other...just one more reminder of His faithfulness.

As for the future--everyone's question of late--we're still headed back to Europe. We think it looks like next summer/early fall. And we don't know where, yet. (Yes, that IS making me a little nutty!) What I appreciate about that, though, is that the indecision is based on not only what is best for our team, but what is best for our family, particularly our kids. We are praying only that God would guide our supervisor as he makes decisions, and that He would prepare our hearts for wherever our next home might be. I will tell you this--we have certainly prayed over whether or not we should return. We honestly looked at whether God was calling us here or there. And I can say without a doubt that He is calling us back to Europe. We have had enough confirmation of that from enough different sources that we are not questioning our next step at all.

So that's the blog from the dock. The wind is starting to really pick up, and my paper is not longer cooperating, so that's my cue to end. I am looking forward to a great day with people I really love. That's a great deal to be thankful for in and of itself. And when I think that it's only one blessing in a life showered with blessings...well, that's enough to leave me speechless. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you are counting your many blessings, and that your husband just sat down next to you with a fishing pole, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

An update for Ada

I don't really know what to say about this, except that Hannah is really enjoying being in America for a while. :)

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:3-4

It's been a while, and a certain someone (Ada Wiisanen) has been after me to update this, so I decided while the house was quiet this morning, I would do just that. There's a lot to tell you, but there's not a lot to tell you at the same time. Life is pretty much what you would expect--I go to work, Marc works at home, the kids go to school, we talk to Sarah Beth frequently, and then we do all of that all over again. We get to see people we haven't seen in a while, we get to do things that are American, we get to eat food we haven't eaten for a while...that's not very interesting stuff to write about, is it? It's fun, and we're enjoying all of that (although American food makes my feet swell...how much salt is there in prepackaged stuff?!), but I'm pretty sure a monologue about eating at a particular restaurant isn't why you log on and read this blog. (If it is, get help. Seriously...something is not quite right with that!)

One of the things we are really enjoying about being home is the many opportunities we have had and will have (especially in the next two months) to talk to churches and associations about the work going on in Europe. I love to speak to different groups about the amazing view of God we've been given during our time on the mission field. It is definitely a unique experience, and we are always thrilled to talk about it. I love the questions we get--everything from food we eat overseas to whether or not we're afraid to live in Russia. People are curious about the language, the kind of people Russians and Czechs are, the places we lived, what we've seen, how our children like being MKs...generally anything about our lives overseas. But what they get really excited about is when we talk about how all of those ordinary (and sometimes extraordinary) things have given God opportunities again and again to show Himself faithful, not just to our little family, but to people all over the world. It is an exciting story, and we are honored to tell it. We also love the chance to thank Southern Baptists all over the U.S. for giving to Lottie Moon and the Cooperative Program, the mechanisms our denomination uses to fund our ministry overseas. We will be doing a lot of that in the next two months, and we're so excited to be able to do that. We are headed out this morning to St. Johns county, where we'll be speaking at a missions conference for the next two days spread out all over the St. Johns Baptist Association. While I know I will be tired by the time we arrive home Sunday night, I am very excited about the chance to tell His story to more people.

Work is fine. I'm so grateful for the job and the steady income it's providing. And I, of course, love to teach. But it's clear to me that my career as a teacher does not have the hold on me it used to have. I'm enjoying myself, I'm loving kids, I'm loving the chance to talk about great books and writing and grammar, but it isn't an enticement for me to stay on this side of the pond like we thought it would be. I prayed and prayed about taking the job, because I was worried (along with Marc and our closest friends) that Marc would never get me back to the mission field. But it has not been that way at all. I'm enjoying it, I'm grateful for it, but I definitely have a sense that I don't fit in that world very well anymore. People are very nice and gracious to me, but I'm definitely an outsider in a way that I wasn't before. And, of course, in three years the school has changed a great deal. I don't know all that many people. So I go, I teach my classes, I do my best to love kids, and then I go home and live my "real" life.

Other than that, life just goes on. We are filling out paperwork to return to the field, working on getting medical clearance for us and the kids, and trying to take every opportunity to do fun stuff together. We are not quite sure where we are heading back to, and that's a long story that I won't get into, but we like the different options we've been given. We are praying through them, listening to the different voices around us, and waiting for God to reveal His perfect plan. One thing I have definitely learned in the last three years is that I would rather follow His plan in every situation. His best is always better than whatever plan I concoct on my own. And He is so faithful to reveal Himself and His plan if we just listen. So we're living our life, going to our speaking engagements, and having a lot of fun...but always with an ear to the ground to see what God may be telling us about what is next.

So that's it. The whole story of our life in America. Okay, probably not the whole story, but the amount of the story I have time to write about this morning. We are glad to be here, but we miss being there. We desperately miss our friends overseas, American, Czech and Russian. We are thrilled to give witness to how God has been at work, but we are also looking forward to the way God will continue to be at work in our lives and in the nations. And we are honored that God chose our little pot-of-clay family to be witnesses to what He is doing around the world. So there you go, Ada. There's your update. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that no matter how ordinary your life may seem, you are constantly aware of the way God is at work, and that you are looking forward to a couple of days of doing nothing but talking about God's work in your life, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

Super Weird

Sarah Beth in her dorm room.

The three of us at the cafe downstairs in the student center.

John did not want to say goodbye. Not even a little.

So with joy--with joy!--you sell it all, you abandon it all. Why? Because you have found something worth losing everything else for. --David Platt, Radical

It would be quite the understatement to say that a lot has changed since the last time I wrote on this blog. Hmmm...we have returned to America, Sarah Beth has gone to college, I have gone back to teaching full-time, the kids are in public school, and Marc is touring the country talking to churches. A little different than it looked a month ago. A month ago, I was sweating through the hottest summer I have ever experienced. Now, I'm wearing a sweater all the time, because I can't get used to the air conditioning. A month ago, it took me an hour to make even the simplest dinner, because everything had to be made from scratch. Now, I'm reveling in the glory that is the American mix. :)

We arrived in the States to find that our church had gone completely overboard preparing a home for us. I'm not kidding--I have yet to do an actual grocery run. I've bought a few things here and there, but mostly, we are still living on food provided by our church. Unbelievable. And from time to time, we are the recipients of drive by giftings, where we arrive home to find something in a bag on the door for us. So sweet. What a pleasure and a joy to be truly loved by a church. A tremendous blessing to us, and a sweet refreshment to our worn-out spirits.

The kids are adjusting. Hannah is doing extremely well, loving school, enjoying friends, inviting everyone she meets to church. John is having a harder time. A new country--one he really doesn't remember much--a big church--different from the 20 Russians we went to church with overseas--and a school where everyone has been together for a long time are making his adjustment a little harder. He'll get there eventually, but it's not an easy time right now. Of course, his sissy leaving and his Daddy being gone haven't made his transition any easier, but such is life.

Marc is doing well, I think, enjoying his time in churches talking about Engage Russia. He misses being overseas, but he's enjoying the time with friends and family here, too. He has lots of interesting opportunities in front of him, and I know he's really excited about what the next year holds and the chance he will have to make connections with churches all over the States. Plus, he's Marc...he's generally a happy sort of fella. God bless him.

As for me...hmmmm...life is weird. It's good. It's positive. But it's super weird. The only thing that isn't weird for me is teaching, which is simply how I engage the world around me. I am really enjoying the time with kids, and I have several situations where I can see God's hand in having me in a particular kid's life for this season. Church is great, though I only know about sixty percent of the people in our church now. I'm singing in the choir, which is fun and wonderful for me. I go to Sunday School, I sing, I go to church, I go to choir practice...I have essentially slipped back into my old life. Super weird.

Because here's the thing...it's my old life, but I'm not my old self. The lens with which I view the world has drastically changed. I have drastically changed in a thousand tangible and intangible ways over the last three years. I cannot--and don't want to--be the person I was before. It's impossible. So I am a new me who looks like the old me living in the old me's life. Like I said, super weird.

So what does that mean? I don't know. Not a clue. Still clearly feel God's call upon my life and the life of my family. Still believe we are destined to be overseas. Still in love with a place that is not my own. Still completely sold on the idea that no matter what we are asked to give up, no matter what we are asked to sacrifice or turn our back on...a life serving Jesus wherever He leads is totally worth it. Crazy? Maybe. But knowing what I know now about truly following Him...I wouldn't choose any other life, no matter how easy that life seems. Not for all the mixes in the world.

Well, time for bed. I am getting up at 4:30 every morning, and it's taking its toll. The good news is that Marc will be home tomorrow, God willing and the creek don't rise. :) I am definitely ready to see my man! Wherever you are in the world, I pray that your life is not super weird, that the God of the universe is in control even if your life is super weird, and that your husband is coming home from Texas tomorrow, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

Faithful

Hannah working this week at English camp. She did an incredible job working with around 30 children doing crafts. So proud of our girl!

Possibly my favorite picture of John and Laini ever taken. This typifies their relationship--in a room full of people, I am pretty sure they only see each other. My children are blessed with incredible friends.

Blessed be the LORD, for He has made marvelous His lovingkindness to me in a besieged city. Psalm 31:21

I have dreaded writing this blog, and so I have put it off until now, our last full day on the field for this term. I got very little sleep last night, and I finally got up around 5 this morning and have been puttering around the house. Our bags are packed (except the laundry that is drying on the racks), the house is clean (except for under the stove and vacuuming), and we have very little left to do here, except the thing we dread the most--saying goodbye.

I could write a whole blog about leaving. I could tell you about the tears shed, how we dread saying goodbye to the Lewises, to Plzen, to the Czech Republic, to this life for the next year. I could write about how excited we are to be going to America, to our family, to our friends, to our church...and all the hellos we are looking forward to saying in the next weeks and months. Those would both be easy topics to write about this morning. But the purpose of this blog has always been to give you a glimpse not of the called, but of the One who calls. And so, this morning's blog is about the ways He has been faithful to me in the last three years on the mission field.

• My children: The hardest thing I have ever done is watch my children struggle through the last three years. No mother anywhere treasures the suffering of her child. My children have had great experiences on the mission field, but they have also had difficult, scary, and heartbreaking experiences on the mission field. They have made tremendous friendships, but they have also had to say goodbye to those friends again and again and again. They have lived in two cultures that are very, very different from their own. They have been yelled at by complete strangers on the street for not wearing a hat or not being bundled enough against the cold. They have had to learn one beastly Slavic language only to move to a place where the Slavic language spoken is just enough different to be incomprehensible. It's been hard, and they have struggled. But they have also thrived. Sarah Beth discovered a facility with language that shocked us all--she picked up tons of Russian just by listening on the metro and walking in parks. Hannah discovered she was a natural musician, even though her music teacher didn't speak English, and she took lessons in Russian and Czech. John John discovered that his love for all humankind is a pretty good way to make friends in spite of language differences. And their Mom discovered that no matter how much I love my kids...God loves them so much more. He is beyond trustworthy. He is beyond merciful. He is beyond compassionate.

• My husband: Let me say this about Marc--he never struggled to be on the field. Never. He struggled to watch the rest of us struggle, because he loves us, and he wants us to be happy. But he was a pig in slop from the moment he set foot on Russian soil. Never in my life have I witnessed anyone fit into a job more perfectly than Marc fit into being a missionary. He worried about the language, but he speaks and understands far better than I do, and certainly far better than he should with as much language training as he received. He discovered a love for anthropology and ethnography that surprised him. And his passionate love for the "little nations"--ethnic groups within the many republics that comprise the Russian Federation--is contagious. I dare you to talk to him about the Chuvash and then try not to pray for them. It's impossible. His passion for the unreached people groups of Russia is inspiring. He makes me want to move to some tiny village and pump my own water in order to reach them. (That's a running joke with my missionary friends...Marc is, at some point, going to convince me to move somewhere where I have an outhouse and have to pump my own water. Wait and see.) When we are gathered at the throne, and every nation and tribe and tongue is there, including the Chuvash, the Mordvin, the Karellian...I firmly believe some will be there because God chose an ordinary video guy from Middleburg, Florida, and then showed him he is more than just Luke telling Paul's story...he's Paul, too.

• My family: Want to know people who are excited about missions? Talk to my parents and sisters. No one, and I mean NO ONE could have had a more supportive immediate family than mine. They have visited, sent packages, called, sent cards, talked on skype, and just generally been the most incredible support system anyone could have. When volunteer teams come to work with us, inevitably someone asks, "And what do your parents think about you being a missionary?" I always say the same thing. I've said it for a while now, and it's absolutely true. I am 100% the person my parents raised me to be. I'm sure they would have loved nothing better than if I had stayed in Middleburg and they could have been at everything for my kids. But never once have they complained. Never. I'm sure they would love for us to return somewhere a little easier than Russia. But they have never been anything but supportive. And when the time came for us to go, they never suggested that God should send somebody else's child and not theirs. It has been hard being away from them, and when I see my Momma and Daddy tomorrow night, I'm pretty sure there will be some jumping up and down, but just like God loves my children, He loves my parents and sisters far more than I can even comprehend.
  

• Myself: It is not possible with mere words to explain every way in which God has been faithful to show me who I really am in Him. I will say that I am not returning to Florida the same person I left. I have never been more miserable than I was the first few months we were in Moscow. I really think I cried most nights. I missed my family and friends and church, but most of all, I missed my life. I missed being "someone." I missed being confident. I missed knowing how to buy meat. :) But even in my misery, I knew that I was not alone. Standing at my kitchen window, looking out at the city, I knew He was with me. And it wasn't because I felt something or had some emotional response to something...I knew because He promised He would be and because He is always true to His promises. He said He would never leave me nor forsake me...and He never did. And no matter how I felt, no matter what my emotions told me...I knew He was true and faithful. And even in things I haven't liked or enjoyed--conflicts, moving, saying goodbye again and again, struggling with my weight, missing my family--even in these things, He has been faithful. Faithful to show me who I am in Him. Faithful to show me that He is in control. Faithful to love me even when I am not very lovable. And faithful to grow in me a love and a passion for the people to whom He has called me. He is faithful, faithful, faithful. I will proclaim it until my dying breath. He is faithful.
  

And so begins our last day of this term. I could write so much more--about priceless friendships, precious colleagues, and beloved national partners. About people we pray for daily to come to know the Lord. About people we will miss terribly. But it all comes back to the same thing...He is faithful and compassionate and merciful beyond measure. He has loved me so much that there is no way to describe it adequately. And so, as I prepare my heart to climb aboard a jet in the morning and set foot on American soil for the first time in a long time, I am so thankful for the experiences and relationships and joy that He has given me in the last three years. And I am thankful for the struggles and difficulties and heartbreak of the last three years. And above all, I am thankful for a God who has so passionately pursued every part of me. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you know how faithful our God is from your own experience, and that you are almost ready to fly home, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

Finding the secret place

Hannah with her pal, Beary Bear. He was a gift from her good friend, Robert.

Me and the Han on Red Square. She doesn't quite look like she did when we left the States three years ago. We've decided to invest in a dungeon for both our girls. You think that'll work?

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness; that my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever. Psalm 30:11-12

I only have a couple of minutes this morning, but I thought an update was in order. We leave the Czech Republic two weeks from today for the States, and we are deep into packing and chaos. :) Actually, at this point it's going pretty well, so the chaos is at a minimum. If we could get the temperature to cool down a bit, that would help. However, that isn't going to happen this week, so no use complaining about it. Suffice to say that it's a little bit like living in a sauna.

I had an interesting experience last night. I was looking through some things on a flash drive and found all of my writing for our original IMB application. Wow--was that an interesting read! Some of it tickled me a little...some of it made me teary. All of it made me stand in awe at the way God has worked in my life and in the life of our family in the last three years. So much of what He has done in my life and in my walk with Him has been about learning to rest in Him, to let myself reside in what the psalmist calls "the secret place." For me, that has meant learning to have a quietness in my quiet time, to sit and listen, to pay more attention to what He's saying and doing than in what I'm requesting from Him. You know where I discovered the secret place? In my kitchen in Moscow. Staring out at that city, knowing I could not put into words my anguish for myself, for my children, and for those we were there to minister to--just sitting and looking out the window--that's where I learned about the secret place of God. I'm not sure I could have learned that in a comfortable place for me. Maybe you can. I'm definitely not admonishing everyone who reads this to head overseas in order to really know God, because one thing I've learned is that how God is at work in me is not always how He is at work in someone else. For me it was necessary for God to pull me out of my comfort zone and teach me in a place where I--literally--could not depend on myself. Only in Him, only in His path for my life--only in the secret place is there contentment and joy and success. I learned that at my kitchen table in Moscow.

I'm thankful for the hardness of the last three years. Nothing about our time on the field has been easy or come easily. Language, culture, homeschooling...none of that has been an easy fit for me. (Not true for Marc--give him some totems, below-freezing temps, and a Russian village where you have to pump your own water and he's like a pig in slop.) But it's been in the struggle, in the times where I simply did not know where to turn or what to do or how to act that God has shown Himself completely enough. Enough for me. Enough for my marriage. Enough for my kids. I love my friends on the field, and I adore my friends and family at home, but if that was stripped away from me, I know that He is still enough. Everything else is just my cup running over with the blessings of a God who loves me beyond my comprehension. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you have found God's secret place, that you know that He is completely enough for you, and that you are taking two little people to DinoPark today, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

Home

In front of the Pushkin statue on Old Arbat in Moscow. We don't study Pushkin much in the States, but Russians consider him one of their greatest writers. When people discover that I am a literature teacher, they always ask, "And do you know our Pushkin?" I do, now. :)

Kids in the Metro. Unless you've been there, you cannot appreciate how far underground the metro actually is. If I thought about it much, it would probably make me uneasy. I don't think about it.

This is for Hannah. It's a Russian pun--The words at the top (Kartofel Free) are referring to the Potatoheads running free in the picture, but it's also how you say french fries. Get it? Get it? Okay, maybe it's only funny in Russian.

So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It's your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it. Colossians 3 The Message

I am enjoying a second cup of coffee and some quiet while the kids are still asleep upstairs. Marc is traveling in Russia on another Engage Russia trip, and Hannah and John and I are here in Czech Republic. I have to admit to you that in the summer, when it is light outside until nearly midnight, I'm not very good at getting my kids to bed at any kind of decent hour, and I let them sleep late. It's not as bad in Czech Republic as Russia, but it's still pretty light outside late at night. Last night we stayed up late playing Phase Ten and laughing at each other. It was the first time John played our family's favorite card game, and he did pretty well. It will be fun for all of us to be able to play when we're back together.

Our time in Russia was unbelievably wonderful. We loved hearing a language we could understand and speak. We loved being with friends, both in Moscow and from all over the Russian-speaking world as our cluster had its general meeting. We loved the time to sing in English, the time to learn from a great speaker, the time to share stories of God working in ways we couldn't have imagined if we had tried. We loved being...home.

Have you ever gone on a wonderful trip to a beautiful place, but sighed in relief when you came around the corner and saw your own house, sitting there waiting for you to return? That's how coming back to Russia was for us. The Czech Republic is a beautiful place. The people are wonderful, kind, generous, and very forgiving of my lack of facility with their language. We live in a great house in a city we love. But this is not home. Russia is home. We are looking forward to going to the States for a year and seeing people we love and miss. But Russia is home. Everywhere we went, God confirmed that for us. Four hours of Russian with our language teacher left our brains complete mush, but left our hearts encouraged and filled. Time with our friend, Sergei, when we gave him a book and a copy of the Jesus film as a birthday gift, left us filled with gratitude for this Chuvash man God put in our hearts six months before our work with the Chuvash began. Time with our American friends left us encouraged and edified. Watching Hannah, who struggled so hard for so long to be in Russia, speak Russian and be so content and comfortable there left us amazed at a God who loves our children so much more than we can even comprehend. You get the idea...God showed us so many ways in which He is and has been at work in our lives.

As we made our way around the city doing various things, it was clear to me that God had given us this time to reconfirm in our hearts our commitment and love for Russia. Everywhere we went, it seemed, Marc had a "guy." A matroyshka guy at the souvenir park, a shashlik (Russian barbecue) guy, our favorite waitress at TGIFriday's. We didn't make it to the southern end of the orange line to see our fruit ladies (they sold us fruit on our nightly walks and became our friends), but to see the look in the faces of people as they recognized us, were glad to see us...what a sweet gift from the Lord. To see Hannah and our language teacher, Irina, arm in arm chatting with one another, to watch Irina's face as John ran to her...precious to us. Even down to the Russian language, which I feared I had completely lost while in the Czech Republic, God found ways to encourage us. I bought a couple of t-shirts for Hannah, and the lady who sold them to me asked me why I spoke such good Russian. Now, let me make it clear that I speak terrible Russian, but just being understood is enough to encourage me. And somehow, God had used my time in Czech Republic to strengthen my Russian. If you can figure that out, more power to you, because I can't. But I'm oh, so grateful.

And so, in all things, we give thanks. We give thanks for wonderful friends, for music and teaching and preaching, for movements of God across the Russian-speaking peoples. We give thanks for things we don't understand, for decisions we must make, for friends who praise God in the midst of difficulty. We give thanks for our children's friendships, for people to miss while we are gone, for new friendships we will cultivate when we return. We give thanks for some difficulties at passport control in Moscow, for the ticket counter lady who was suspicious of our passports and visas (and for enough Russian to understand her), for the people on the bus who would not help with our bags, for a long trip back home without Daddy. We give thanks for our time left in Plzen, for our relationships here, for the chance to teach three more Bible lessons at Bible study, for our relationships at church. And we give thanks that in 32 days we will be on American soil, for time with our parents, for our church who is providing a place for us to live, for time with Sarah Beth before we take her to college. Even in the hard, even in the bittersweet, in all things, we give thanks.

And now, it's time to get to work. So many things to sort through, so many things to give away, so many decisions about what to take home. Our clothes are so pitiful that very little will make it into a suitcase headed to America--we will definitely be the ragamuffin family when we get off the plane! We took our very best to Russia, and even that isn't in great shape. But it's okay, because clothes are just clothes. Things are just things. The important things we are bringing back to America are intangibles--memories, relationships, time with God...those things pack pretty light. :) Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you know where home really is, and that you are going to beat your 13 and 9-year-old in Phase 10 today, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye