Saturday, December 6, 2008

Lessons I've learned about success

Anastasia smiles for the camera while everyone tries their first pumpkin pie (which I made totally from scratch and turned out to be pretty tasty).
Marc is explaining something to Anastasia, and she is obviously listening pretty intently.
Sergei is smiling at something Karoline said, while Leigha (sitting) waits to eat and Marina (looking at the camera) goes to get something to drink.
The table set for dinner. The tablecloth, napkins and plates were sent to us by my sister's Sunday School class at First Baptist of Allen, Texas. The plates have part of Psalm 100 on them, and everyone spent time reading them before they got their food.

We must renounce confidence in our ability, acknowledging that it is only by His indwelling life that we accomplish anything of value...Ability becomes a liability when we trust in the ability instead of trusting in God. --Grace Rules by Steve McVey

Yesterday was our English Club Thanksgiving celebration, and we are very happy with how things went. We ate, talked, laughed, and each person had the chance to say what they are thankful for in their lives. Marc prayed in Russian (yea, Marc!) and read from the Psalms. Then, in a moment I will not soon forget, Sergei read a poem about being thankful to God. Then he looked around at each of us and said, "I am thankful to the Lord, for He has been very good to me." That may seem like a baby step to anyone living outside of Eastern Europe, but for those of us here, it's a giant leap. It is good and comforting to see progress...a testimony to God's grace toward us.

One of the things that has happened is that my idea of what success is has changed over the fourteen months we've been here. I will never forget sitting across from Teri Tarleton at ILC in Richmond and hearing her say, "Kellye, my only fear for you is your need for success. Success in Russia looks different from success here." When I came to Russia, the thing that drove me the nuttiest was that I felt like I'd been put in a situation where success was not an option. Full-time language and full-time homeschooling didn't leave much of an option for feeling anything less than a failure. I probably muttered to myself a thousand times, "If I can't do it well, it can't be done." Looking back on that, I hear the pride wrapped up in the idea that I am so...smart, organized, together, motivated, hard-working...that I can do anything. And my intentions were good. I wanted to succeed at this life just like I'd succeeded in my life in the States. I wanted to be successful for God, to do great things for Him.

Of course, what I've learned is that God doesn't need me to be successful for Him. He needs me to be available. He needs me to be faithful. He needs me to be listening. He needs me to be open to things I've never, in my whole life, considered doing. But He doesn't really need me to be successful. You want to know the truth? There's a lot less pressure in a life that isn't so focused on success. I don't have to have the biggest English club to feel like I'm doing what God wants me to be doing right now. I don't have to have great AP scores. I don't have to speak perfect Russian. (Ha! I'll NEVER speak perfect Russian!) I just have to do whatever it is He's given me the grace for this day. Tomorrow, I'll get more grace and a different set of instructions. I don't have to worry. He's got it all under control. He'll let me know when I need to know what's next. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you are depending totally on God for whatever is next in your life, and that your team and your husband's team will NOT be playing in the national championship against one another. Go Gators!!! Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is that called the "perfect game"? So glad the dinner went well. Amazing the changes from last December till this December? Isn't God good?!!!

For a hefty price, when the big game isn't going your way, maybe the slingbox could "have a little problem" shall we say??????

Haha,

Love ya'll,

Kay

Lynda Halliger Otvos (Lynda M O) said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lynda Halliger Otvos (Lynda M O) said...

Kellye, many heartfelt thanks for putting Thanksgiving pics of my family on your blog. I follow your musings faithfully since we lost Teri. When you mention her in your posts, I feel as tho I am learning things about her that i didn't know.

She served as an idol to me. Thanks for keeping her memory alive.