Saying yes

I especially like Zachary and Sarah Beth's expressions here. I think they tell a tale.

The "normal" picture of the Plzen Six.

This was taken October, 2008. It gives you a little idea of how much our kids have changed over their time on the field. John and Laini were probably building a fort when this was taken.

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. I Corinthians 10:31

Well, for those of you who read this regularly, I want you to know that we survived Sarah Beth's leaving pretty well. Sunday was awful, because the dread of her leaving was so terrible. But when I woke Monday morning, I had a sense of peace and calm. She was ready. And interestingly, so were we. Of course, I've talked to her every day, and I'm thoroughly enjoying how much she is enjoying herself. Who wouldn't want to listen to their kid have fun?! She is loving being home, enjoying family, enjoying American food, and getting excited about the future. And though we miss her, we are determined to enjoy our time here, too, to be all here for this moment. There is a fine line between anticipating the future and living in it instead of in the present. We are trying to walk the right side of that line.

Our time here continues to wind down. It's an odd sensation, really, to think about going home. My life is here. Thinking about my life being in Florida for a while is strange to me. Oh, I'm looking forward to it--I am a girl who needs to see my Momma and Daddy and sisters and aunts and uncles and cousins--but it's kind of unreal to me right now. And to be honest, I've been so wrapped up in what's next for us--in terms of our missionary life--that Florida has just been something I've been unable to comprehend. Our future looms on the horizon, but it's a pretty fuzzy picture at the moment. It comes a little more into focus every day, but I'm still not able to totally make it out. And if you know me, you know that is making me a little crazy. Uncertainty is not something I'm great at handling. I'm a checklist-loving, type-A gal. Not having a lock on what's next...well, it can make Kellye a cranky girl.

So why not just stay in Florida? There is life there, work there, family there. My sister asked me if it wouldn't be really hard to return to the field after living in the States. I replied that I thought it would, but I couldn't imagine not returning. I've thought about that conversation all week. Why come back? We've sacrificed. We've "done our time." We've sat through three years of church services we barely understood (and at first, didn't understand at all). We've learned another language, ministered to people, known some hardship. Why not stay in Florida? I like Florida. I like English. I like my job and my family and my church in Florida. I like who I am in Florida. So why not stay there?

Here's my only answer--we are compelled by a holy God to be here. And maybe when we knew Him less, we could have ignored that. Maybe we could have said no to that compulsion. But after having a front row seat for the amazing works of our amazing God for three years...how could we ignore Him now? Our life the last three years has not always been comfortable, has not always been easy...but in every challenge, in every moment, He has been there. On dark Moscow nights, when my soul cried out to Him, He was there. When my precious friend died unexpectedly, He was there. When I realized how sick John was in January, He was there. When we moved to Plzen, He was there. When Sarah Beth's heart was broken, He was there. And yes, when we watched her walk through passport control with a little grin and a wave on Monday, He was there, too. In the triumphs, in the failures, through laughter and tears...He was there. He promised He would never leave me nor forsake me, and He has been faithful to that promise. He has never left. Never. And all He asks in return is my obedience. That's a pretty simple request from the God of the Universe. I cannot imagine saying no. So even though the picture of our future is still kind of fuzzy, I am content that the God who has been there will continue to be there, that He will continue to be faithful, that He will continue to carve out for us a life that is far beyond what I could even dream for myself and my family.

Well, I should run. John is roaming around aimlessly while I write this--never a good thing. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that whatever God asks you to do today, you will simply say 'yes,' and that the sun is starting to shine in your part of the world, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye