What was hard about today

But now, thus says the LORD, your Creator, O Jacob, and He who formed You, O Israel, "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine!" Isaiah 43:1

Today was one of those days that is hard for reasons that are hard to define. We had a lovely morning--John-John played with his friend Laini, Sarah Beth and Marc did computer stuff, Hannah and I went for a beautiful walk, the apartment got cleaned (it's tiny, so that only took about thirty minutes). We had a ministry event with a church plant in Mechanicsville, VA, where we did some surveying in teams. Then we had a cookout with the rest of our region. There was a beautiful lake with geese and ducks where the kids could feed the animals. We had actual desserts--oreos and nutter butters (we NEVER have dessert). I truly adore the people I work with. I cannot explain the ways in which our hearts are knitted together. It wouldn't make sense even if I could find the words. So what was hard?

I'm homeless. I went to these big, beautiful homes, and I didn't exactly covet them for their size and beauty, but for their existence. These people were relaxing on a Saturday afternoon in THEIR living rooms, on THEIR couches, watching THEIR tvs. I don't have any of those things anymore. I don't have a place to belong right now. I was hot and tired and thirsty, and I would have rather cut off my left arm than talk to one more person.

It was college football kickoff day. If you know us AT ALL, you know how much we love college football. And we didn't see a single game. My beloved Gators played, and I was out knocking on doors. Even if I'd been home, I don't have a tv. Marc is in the other room listening to the Oklahoma game on his computer, with his head bent low to hear what's going on, because the connection isn't great. He didn't make chili today. Let me say that again: Marc Hooks did not make chili on the first day of college football season. And it made me sad. Or if not sad, melancholy.

Don't get me wrong--we really had a fabulous day. Marc and I love to do ministry together. We took the girls, and we were so proud of them--they struck out on their own with other people (Hannah with another family and SB with a set of journeywomen). And I know I've already said it, but we really enjoy so much the people we are working with. They are funny and irreverent and totally committed to God and His purposes for their lives. There are deep conversations, certainly, but there is also a whole lot of laughter. We are quickly becoming a kind of family.

Some days, like yesterday, which was shot day, are days to power through, and it's almost like there isn't time to think about much but the task at hand. But other days, like today, are slower and seemingly perfect, and those are sometimes the most difficult, because they are days when we have the time to think about the little comforts we are leaving behind. I am homesick for my family and friends, but I'm not pining away for Florida in particular. I'm just lonely for a home. Of course, in a few weeks, I'll have a home, won't I? It's in a highrise apartment building in the largest city in Europe, so it's not like any other home I've ever had, but it'll still be home. And I can promise you this--Marc will be up every Saturday morning during football season to make his chili, and he'll be up in the middle of the night listening to Oklahoma football on his computer and trying not to yell and wake us all up. Who knows? Maybe there's a big contingent of Gator and Sooner fans in Moscow. I've seen stranger things happen! Blessings!

His,
Kellye