What true love is really waiting for

Sarah Beth and her sweet DJ

The Han and John John

Me and my sweet man

Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life. Proverbs 4:23

Ah, Valentine's Day. Marc and I celebrated last night--I made him his favorite homemade pizza, and we watched tv shows on our DVR in Texas. Sarah Beth flew home to Florida last night to celebrate with her DJ--a gift from us to them for Christmas. It makes me smile to think of them together--their sweetness to one another is smile-inducing, to say the least. What Momma doesn't want to see her child happy in love? It's a new season, a different season, but it's certainly a sweet season. And with an almost-16-year-old daughter and an almost-12-year-old son in the house, we certainly are thinking--A LOT--about love. (If you want to know how to successfully flip your hair or the importance of brushing your tongue in order to be more attractive to the ladies, by the way--John John is the guy to talk to. OH, MY!!) Put that together with the news that True Love Waits--an abstinence program from the nineties--is coming back into 'vogue' with churches, and it got me to thinking about what true love is really waiting for in the end.

I have a secret for every teenaged boy who is wondering what in the world girls are interested in: look at their facebook page. If you go to Han's facebook page, you'll see lots of stuff about cats (yes, we are cat crazy), funny stuff from Tumblr (yesterday's Venn Piagram, for example), and silliness between her and her girlfriends (very, very entertaining stuff, by the by). But you'll also find there posts about what she's listening to on Spotify (look at all those love songs and praise songs and acoustic guitar covers), and you'll find YouTube videos of songs she particularly loves. This week, the post was a song from a group we really, really like--Anthem Lights. It's called "Hide Your Love Away," and it was a release for Valentine's Day. The chorus says, "Hide your love away/ Wait for me/ Wait for me/ I will do the same/ Wait for me/ Wait for me/ There will come a day/ When I finally say/ Staring in your eyes/ I've waited my whole life/ For this night." It has these words in the bridge: "I'm holding on for you/ My heart belongs to you/ Your love is spoken for." Now, I'm sure there's a component of this song that's about sexual purity, and certainly, that's a core value for evangelical Christians. So don't walk away from this and think that Kellye doesn't think sexual purity before marriage is important, because I obviously do. But I think there's something really, really telling in this song that goes far beyond a call to abstain before marriage. The reason Han and her friends love, love, love this song is that it hits at one of the deepest needs of the heart--the belief that there is, out there somewhere, a soulmate. Not someone who thinks you're pretty. Not someone who thinks you're smart or funny or any of the other great qualities of any particular person. Because those are things anybody can think. They aren't special. What I'm talking about is the belief that somewhere in the world is the person God created just for you, the person for whom He created you. The belief that somewhere in the world is a person whose soul wraps around yours in a way that nobody else's soul does. A soulmate.

Isn't that what romantic movies are all about? Isn't that what every Nicholas Sparks book is about? We want to believe that there is someone out there who understands us, who loves us, who sees in us the good that maybe nobody else sees. Looks, beauty, passion...those things are great, and they add spice and wonder to life. They are certainly gifts from the Father of lights. But it's that deep connection that every person longs for. It's the reason Marc and I enjoy each other's company so, so much. I don't just love him. I get him. I understand him. And he understands me. We can communicate across a room with just a look, because he has stared into the depths of who I am, and he has not found me wanting or lacking. We fit. DJ and Sarah Beth are cute and sweet and funny, but what's magical about them is watching them truly like and understand one another. True love, my friends, is waiting for that one person who understands us, who sees who we really, truly are, and thinks we are perfect for them. True love is waiting for that person who speaks truth to us on a daily basis, but who also affirms who we are at the deepest parts of our souls. I have an ongoing joke with Hannah. When she comes out and I say, "Oh, Nan, you look beautiful," her reply is always, "Oh, stop you!" When I reply, "OK. I'll stop," she always grins and says, "No, Mom. Never stop. Please." It's a running gag, and I'm not attaching particular depth to it, but there IS something kind of important about that, isn't there? We all need somebody to tell us the good stuff, to remind us that we are children of God--beautiful, talented, amazing...worthy. Not worthy of worship, certainly--only God is worthy of worship. But worthy of someone else's time, attention, desire, love...worthy. 

I've prayed for years for the people my children will marry, if that's the plan God has for them. And much of what I've prayed is based not only the Scriptures, and what God has to say about marriage, but also on my own experience as a wife. I want for my children what I have--someone whose love helps me be the best version of myself. Without Marc, I would have been very content with my books and my cats. But I would have missed out on so much adventure that God has showered on my life through our marriage. I would have missed my soulmate. I would have had a good life, but I would have missed the best life God had for me. Because Marc is the best life God had planned. I'm glad I didn't miss him. :) So we prepare for SB's wedding with a smile, because the guy we prayed for showed up and is a really wonderful person who loves her and treats her exactly the way every parent alive wants their little princess treated. And we continue to pray for that guy who will come along and sweep the Nan off her feet, and the very special young woman who is God's best plan for John John. (We're praying she is someone with LOTS of energy.) Because somewhere out there, true love is waiting...for them.

Speaking of true love--I need to go make apple cinnamon muffins for mine. I love for everyone to wake up on Saturday mornings to the smell of something divine and wonderful, and since Marc is sure that cinnamon is what heaven smells like...it seemed a good choice for this rainy, dreary Saturday morning. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that your true love makes you the very best version of yourself, and that you DON'T have an expense report and German homework to do today, too. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye