I'm tired of goodbyes

Rose and Kristen, the daughters of our friends Frances and Kris. These are funny, funny girls.
Andrew has literally just said, "Aunt Kellye, don't take my..." Yeah. I didn't listen.
This is me with my friend, Addie. Addie is from Great Britain, and she has the coolest accent ever. She is here as part of FBC, Fort Lauderdale, which is a hugely missions-minded church.
Frances managed to find a tombstone, "over the hill" birthday candle and loaned it to me. What would I do without such good friends?

Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. I John 2:15

Right before we left Florida, I had to go to the eye doctor, because my eyes were so dry that I literally was having trouble seeing (and I looked like I was smoking a crack pipe because they were so red). He is a family friend, knew we were leaving for the mission field, and asked if I'd been crying. I told him I had literally been crying for a month and a half. He told me I had cried out all the reserve fluids in my eyes. I had cried out all my natural tears, and it was causing the terrible dryness and redness I was experiencing. He prescribed a drop, which helped immensely, and my eyes were better after I left Florida, because I stopped crying so much.

I hate goodbyes. I am terrible at them. I am a big, weepy crybaby about them. And I thought when I left the States my goodbyes were done. I had no idea, no clue whatsoever, that life on the mission field is a seemingly endless series of goodbyes to people we love. Whether it's visa issues that force people out of the country, stateside assignments for a year, or folks who resign from the Board and go back to "normal" life in the States, we have said goodbye to way more people here than I had planned.

Yesterday, we said goodbye to a family we love. They are headed back to an uncertain future, but they know who is in charge. Their peace in the midst of the storms of life is inspiring. I love them so much, and their kids have played with our kids again and again...in fact, one of their kids came home with us yesterday to play for several hours. But I didn't want to say goodbye to them. I want them to stay. It turns out, however, that I am not in charge of things. I don't even get to understand why they have to leave, why God is choosing this moment to send them back. But it isn't mine to understand. It isn't even theirs to understand. Our only call is to obedience.

When we told people we were headed to the mission field, many thought we were nuts. I mean completely crazy. But the truth is that when we hear the call on our lives--no matter what that call is--it is hard to say no to it. Don't get me wrong--we did say no for years. But the relief, the peace that came with simply saying "yes" no matter what other people thought was worth them thinking we were nuts. Little about giving up everything you've worked for and heading overseas to make little money makes sense in the ordinary, every day world. But we are called--all of us who are believers--to turn our backs on the world, to not be conformed to it. Part of not being conformed to the world for us is wrapped up in finances, security, a future we can predict, and a nice, hefty retirement. But it's also about relationships we must make, and then we must let go. It's so hard. But it's what we are called to for this season of our lives.

One of the birthday letters Marc received was from a fellow missionary here in Russia. In it, he said, "Thank you for choosing the rewards of heaven over the pleasures of today and for choosing to pursue a dream instead of security." At the table yesterday during a farewell brunch, our friend Ed wondered aloud at where and when this group of people would ever be together again. When will we sit across the table again from these people we love? Only God knows. But there is great comfort and yes, security, in knowing that we will. It may not be this side of heaven, but we will. Until then, we just have to pursue God with all our might, love the people we're given for the season we are given them, and count on God to comfort and love us through the goodbyes.

Well, it's time to run get breakfast. We have Hannah's promotion to middle school this afternoon, so I have to go make some egg salad before Irina gets here for Marc's language lesson. Wherever you are in the world, I pray that you are loving the friends God has given you, and that you are NOT suffering from headcold number 566 this morning. Blessings to you and yours!

His,
Kellye